My Shameful Acts of Lust
by lel2768
Summary: Edward surprises himself in Bella's Bedroom


Edward Cullen

I am spending almost every night in my precious Bella's bedroom, watching over her while she sleeps.

I know that most humans would find this behaviour strange, I myself sometimes feel like the ultimate peeping tom.

My brothers, and sometimes my sisters too, tease me about my lack of sexual prowess. Knowing that I am still a virgin at my age amuses them. It frustrates me that they can be so insensitive. Don't they realise that I can hear them during their night time activities? Do they not know that I have needs too? I have heard the lust filled thoughts of so many people, both family and strangers. How can my own family think that listening to them making love, or as Emmett puts it, Fucking Rose's brains out, not have any effect on me? To quote Emmett again, I am very familiar with Pam and her five sisters.

Thankfully, they were not aware of that fact.

Hearing Bella vocalise, calling my name in her sleep usually has me excusing myself from her presence, slipping quietly from her window into the woods to relieve myself. This has been happening much more recently, as our make out sessions have been becoming more intense. I prayed that she hadn't noticed that my skin wasn't the only hard part of me during our time spent kissing. Sometimes I thought that I'd spontaneously combust due to the fire going through my loins.

I am thoroughly ashamed of my behaviour at these times, but what choice do I have. I know that if I allowed it, Bella would most likely risk her life to consumate our relationship. I would never allow it though. Her safety is my number one priority and I was not about to gamble with my beloved's life just to satisfy my own selfish needs.

These were the thoughts that were passing through my head when suddenly I heard my name. Bella was almost panting it.

"Oh Edward, hell yessssssss!"

Oh for the love of all that's holy. She was going to be the death of me. I was hard. Instantly, painfully so. My erection was struggling against my faded blue denims.

I was about to leave her room once more, when I was almost overwhelmed by a new scent. Bella was aroused, seriously so. The smell of her vaginal juices was even more appealing to me than her blood.

I looked towards where she lay on the bed. She had kicked off some of her covers and I could see... oh fuck, I could see. Where her boy shorts had slipped to one side, I could see a small patch of heaven. Her pale silky skin, covered sparsely in soft hazelnut hair. I couldn't take my eyes away from the sight. Her skin there was moist. She was wet for me. I couldn't leave. I had to stay... watch. God forgive me.

I found myself stroking my penis. How it had got into my hand I didn't know.

"Please Edward."

Bella's hand moved to her breasts, fondling them gently through her silky vest.

The sight of that was almost too much to bear. I stroked faster, harder. _What the fuck am I doing, here, in her bedroom? The disrespect that I am showing her. _I couldn't find it in myself to stop though.

"Edward. Oh!"

My Bella was still dreaming of me. My eyes were raised towards the heaven that I'd never be allowed to enter as I neared my release.

"Edward. What. Are. You. Doing?"

I suddenly realised that she was awake. My hand flew from my cock. _Holy shit, how could I explain this? _I wished my cock limp but I was still so aroused. No amount of wishing would change that.

"Bella, I , I a..am so, so, sorry. I'm the worst piece of perverted shit on this earth. I can't apologise enough."

"Edward, for Christ's sake, stop apologising and get over here. I need you." I could not believe what she was saying. But God, I was too far gone to argue.

Against my better judgement, I joined her on her bed. Her pull to me was almost magnetic.

"Bella, I'm" she stopped me in my tracks.

"Edward, shut it. Right now. Stop with the apologising. I've wished for this for so long." She reached for my engorged length and started stroking where I'd left off.

If I wasn't already dead, I'd have happily died right there and then. Her warm hand on my shaft almost had me undone.

"Oh fuck, Bella," I whispered.

I could still smell her arousal. I needed to taste. _Could I?_

Expressing my wishes, using profanities, clearly had an effect on my darling.

"Edward, I want you to take me. Fuck me. Right now." How could such talk turn me on? I was harder than ever. The need to release myself was even greater.

"Bella, baby. I can't. I desperately want to, but I'll hurt you if I take you now."

"Well let me taste you at least?" She asked.

I knew I could do her serious damage but I was too far gone. I couldn't deny her. I wanted this. Now.

"Yes Bella, please."

She couldn't even make her way down my torso properly. I was still fully clothed. Her mouth went straight to my throbbing cock.

_Jeezus. I have never felt the likes. Her hot mouth on my cold hard cock. It took every bit of my self control to stop me exploding in her immediately. _

She sucked and licked my shaft in all the right ways, gently but firmly stroking what she couldn't fit in her mouth. She dragged her teeth along my length. Oh fuck, I felt my climax building. I would not ejaculate in her mouth. As much as I wanted to. I couldn't. That would be so wrong.

"Bella. I'm close sweetheart."

It appeared that she had other ideas.

"Bella, please. I'm going to..."

I pulled her off me by the hair, probably with more force than was strictly necessary. Seconds later I emptied my seed all over her bedclothes.

I felt so ashamed. What had I just done? She must hate me. She should hate me. But no, all I could sense from her was her aroused state. If anything it had heightened. Was it possible that she enjoyed that?

Could I redeem myself by giving my Bella release? I needed to try.

"Bella, lie down. I need to taste you." I instructed her.

As always, she complied immediately.

I removed her boy shorts and inhaled deeply. The smell had me hard again instantly, my cock still on the outside of my pants.

"Edward, take off your clothes, please," she insisted. Against my better judgement I complied. I stood before her, completely naked and she was smiling, biting her bottom lip, a wicked glint in her eyes.

I couldn't wait any longer. I had to taste her, bury my face in her fleshy, wet core.

I gently parted her folds and licked her hole. It was saturated with her juices. The taste was amazing. I had to taste more. I tongued her insides, her juices running down my throat. She tasted like ambrosia, food of the Gods. The audible gasps coming from her were telling me I was doing things right. I needed her to orgasm at my hand. I knew that I should take care of the tingling mound of nerves that was her clit. I rubbed my finger around that area while lapping up her juices.

"More, Edward. I need more," she begged.

I lowered my tongue until I was sucking gently on her clitoris. Bella's panting became heavier. She began to buck against me. She was close. Even with my limited experience I knew that. I slipped my index finger into her hole.

"More, fuck, please Edward." She whispered.

I added a second finger and pumped them against her bucking body.

"Please, Bella, Let go." I begged. And she did, quivering all over. I had never experienced anything like it, but prayed to God that I would, time and time again.

"Fuck me Edward."

_What? Did I just hear her say that? Was it a reaction to her orgasm? She couldn't be serious surely?_

"Edward, take me, please, right now. Please, I need to feel you inside me," she begged.

Oh Christ. I was so weak. Like always, I could never deny her.

I laid her on her back and placed my engorged, twitching cock at her entrance and pushed in, ever so slowly, trying to be as gentle as possible, aware that I could kill her if I moved too fast or too hard.

"Jesus, that feels so good," she told me. I pushed a little further.

My Bella winced, as I pushed past her hymen. I smelled the blood, but it didn't have the normal effect. I was more intent on how aroused she was... we both were.

"Please, Edward, more," she begged.

I was lost. To her, to my senses., but aware enough to be determined to thrust slowly.

My cock was on fire within her hot, wet hole. I knew I wouldn't last long.

I set a rhythmic pace. Gradually getting faster. Bella was meeting my every thrust. Her panting was like music to my ears.

"Bella, I'm close to cumming." I told her, my cock throbbing.

"Cum for me, Edward., she commanded.

"Cum with me sweetheart," I whispered.

That was all it took and we both came together, joining together, falling apart. I had never experienced anything like it. Not in my hundred and eight years. It was magical.

"Thank you," She whispered to me.

Bella slept then, with me caressing her until the morning...

Once the euphoria died, common sense kicked in.

What had I just done? I risked my darling Bella just to get my rocks off. I was a disgrace. When I thought of how I'd pulled her hair, hurting her just to stop myself from spurting in her mouth. The shame of it. So much for my principles. I was the same as every seventeen year old male at school. Each of them harboring lust filled thoughts. Many directed at my reason for existence. I hated what they'd thought about her. What they'd like to do to her. And yet, I'd just done it. I truly am a monster.

Charlie got up early. Looking forward to yet another fishing trip with Harry. If he knew what I'd done to his daughter, under his roof. How would I ever make this up to her? How could I explain?

Once Charlie left. I went downstairs. Hoping that breakfast in bed would sweeten Bella up for my sincere apology.

I made her an omelette. I was just about to put it on a tray, along with some fresh orange juice when I heard her getting up. I wasn't even going to be able to honor her with breakfast in bed. I heard her coming downstairs.

Since Carlisle turned me, I was invincible. But now I was scared. Petrified. I set the table at my speed. So that it would be ready for her.

I couldn't bring myself to look at her, afraid to see what damage I'd done to her.

"Edward, this looks amazing. You shouldn't have."

She sounded incredibly happy. How could that be? I stood by the door to the living room. My head down, terrified to look at her.

"Edward, baby, what's wrong?" She asked, the concern in her voice obvious.

She walked towards me and put her arms around me. I flinched. Thoroughly ashamed of who I was and what I'd done.

I had to ask.

"Did I hurt you, Bella? Hurt you in any way?"

"Hurt me? Edward, I don't understand?"

"Last night, you know... when we...?"

Reality dawned on her at last.

"Oh for fuck's sake Edward. You are seriously not stressing over the best night of my life?"

_Did I hear that properly? The best night of her life? Did my beloved just berate me for my concern?_

"I pulled your hair. It must have been painful?" _Was that the best I could come up with?_

"Jesus. H. Christ, Edward. Do. Not. Do This. I just lost my virginity to my seriously hot, well cold, boyfriend. I am so buzzing with happiness. I want to take you back upstairs right now for a repeat performance. So listen to me, and listen good. You will NOT spoil this for me with your worrying. Here is what's gonna happen. I am gonna eat this awesome breakfast. Then I am going upstairs for a shower and you, well you are going to join me in the shower. Comprendi?"

Fuck, Bella was so sexy when she was mad. I felt a twitch in my groin. My cock was painfully hard again. How could I possibly refuse her. I didn't want to. I was damned to hell.?

I watched her eat, trying to establish if she had any bruises. I found it hard to believe that I hadn't hurt her at all.

"Edward," She said between mouthfuls. "When you pulled my hair, it was so damned hot. To see you explode on my bed. Fuck, just Fuck."

"Upstairs now Swan," I commanded. I couldn't wait any longer.

She laughed and poked her tongue out at me before disappearing.

I gave chase at human speed. Allowing her to reach the bathroom and switch the shower on.

My Bella stripped. The first sight of her naked form would have taken my breath away if there was breath to take.

She got into the shower. I watched the water running over her body. My cock twitched.

"Get in here with me Edward," She demanded.

Who was I to refuse?

I almost ripped my clothing off in my rush to join her.

Our kissing was frantic, our tongues warring for place in each others mouths. My hands roamed her naked form, as hers did mine. I took her left nipple in my mouth, sucking hungrily. My ministrations rewarded when my Bella moaned, clearly enjoying the sensations my mouth was having on her. She took my cock in her hand. The warmth of it, together with the hot water rushing over our bodies was unbelievable. I couldn't have been more turned on.

"Fuck, Edward. I am so wet," Bella taunted me.

I was aware of her aroused state. I could smell it. I needed to taste her again.

I inserted a finger into her hot, wet hole.

"Oh Christ, yes." I was rewarded with her outcry.

I withdrew it and sucked on my digit. The taste was heavenly.

"More, please," she commanded.

"Bella, I need to take you, Now, hard. I will not hurt you. I'm sure of that now." I pleaded, needing to be inside her.

"Please, just fuck me Edward." Her reply was instant.

I positioned her hands on the wall, making her bend, her ass pouting at me. I so wanted to fuck that. _Soon, not now but soon._

I took her from behind, this position allowing me to penetrate her deeper. I humped her as hard as my control would allow. My fingers were massaging her clitoris.

I was rewarded soon.

"Oh fuck, Edward. I am so horny. Make me cum baby."

"Bella, you are so wet. So hot. I love you so much." I all but grunted in her ear.

I continued to thrust into her, trying hard to control my body.

"F..fuck... Edward, so good. Am so close.

I knew I wouldn't be able to hold on much longer.

"Let go my darling. Cum for me," I begged.

"Edward," she screamed. I felt her pussy tighten around my already throbbing cock.

I let go, filling her with my cold, venomous spunk.

We came down together, the water had run cold.

There were no words to explain how I felt in that moment.

I had made love to my Bella, twice now. She was my everything. My lover, my best friend, my life.

Things could just not get better.


End file.
